Give Children Choices

Drill Sergeants may work in the Army but not when it comes to raising children! Give children choices.   If we want children to make good choices when the stakes are high, we must give them opportunities to make decisions when they are toddlers.  

·         Choice is a great way to redirect a child.  For example, if a child is throwing his or her toys you can respond by saying, “You may not throw your toys, but you can toss these balls into the hoop,” or “Help me fold the socks and toss them into the laundry basket.”   Young children need to run, climb, throw and explore.  Your goal should be to find acceptable outlets for these developmentally appropriate activities.

·         Of course, as parents, you need to make the major decisions like which school is best for your child and any issues regarding health and safety  but, whether they wear the red outfit or blue or eat string beans or carrots really does not matter but gives them an opportunity to make a choice between two good alternatives.

·         Choice helps children learn how to make good decisions.

·         Be careful not to give too many choices.  In most cases, two is a good number.

·         Choice let’s children feel they have some control over their own decisions.

·         Giving children some control over their choices shows them you trust their judgment. 

·         Perhaps most importantly, making their own choices helps children learn to be responsible for their decisions.